A Brave Attempt?

(The classic I have no one but myself to take a photo of me shot: tuk-tuk ride in Siem Reap, Cambodia)

            Brave is not a term that usually comes to mind when describing myself, but recently, this label has been attributed to my persona more often than usual. I am told I am brave for doing this on my own. Being alone is not something that happens in this culture on a regular basis, so many people are concerned and find it hard to believe that someone would up-root themselves from family and friends, and not bring any of them with you—even for work. At the family-run hostel I stayed at in Cambodia, once they knew I was traveling solo, every time I left the hostel, I was asked  ‘Hello Lady! Where are you going?’. I've heard that this statement is linked to the time of Khmer Rouge, as during that time, it was a way to look out for others. Now, its engrained in the culture. Upon my return, I was meet by the mother who would smile, attach herself to my arm and ask how I was doing, and be sure to wish me to sleep well and have a good night. One evening one of the other family members even asked  ‘Hello Lady! Are you happy?!’

            I believe that at the heart of this lies concern in the fact that I’m not just a person travelling alone, but that  its largely to do with the fact that I’m a female. Acknowledging this as a drawback is a part of being ‘smart’ in my travels and living in a new country and region on my own. I think of how I worry about walking on my own when it gets dark, and have set an informal self-imposed curfew to ease this anxiety. While I might have had this concern in Boston or anywhere else I’ve lived, the language barrier and my still waning familiarity with streets and ‘good versus bad’ areas, makes this feeling escalate. With the many warnings I’ve received about bag snatching, I always make sure the zipper faces forward, and is on the side furthest away from on-coming traffic. Hearing stories of motorcyclists snatching purses and as a result persons being dragged into moving traffic that almost stops for no one is enough to make me stay as alert as possible. Although this gets tricky when walking sidewalks and motorcycles zoom by on either side. I don’t think any of these actions are brave in any way, but more exercises of safety precautions.

            On this weekend’s effort to make the most of the daylight, I was finally successful in finding cutlery and a mug and I did some basic shopping for the up-coming week. I also came across a small café within 10 minutes walk that serves delicious budget meals and plays the likes of The Temptations. Its walls lined with bamboo stalks and the space simply decorated with live plants serves as an escape from the world of cement that makes this city. The highlight has to be finding an amazing art gallery, my favourite so far! The artwork was by a French couple, and they used imagery from everyday Vietnamese life, combining and layering these images as sharp detailed graphics, with vibrant oil and acrylic paintings to set the backdrop. I was there long enough for the man and woman running the gallery to offer me a stool. There, I was happy, spending my time going through all the prints and climbing the three stories building to see all the art displayed.

            

Learn, Question, Grow

            ‘Welcome to the Habitat Family’—a colourful sign greets you as you enter the office along with the clearly displayed ‘Mission, Values & Vision’ and photos of  many smiling faces on past builds. Although the purpose of this blog is to mainly capture lessons learnt from interning with Habitat Vietnam, I’ve blogged in detail about almost everything else besides this.  For those who have been following my time here, I think it’s long overdue to share about my time there.

            My workday is from 9:30am to 5:30pm and usually starts with sharing a taxi to the office with my supervisor. The office is located in an alleyway where some families live and we are usually greeted by the neighbors’ dogs, a mother and her child—who only seems to like us from afar, and by the ever-friendly security guard at Habitat. On more than one occasion, in my coming and goings from the office, I have heard Backstreet Boy’s music from his laptop, and considering my eternal love for this boy-band, it is always a great start to my day. Before making it to my desk, there’s a round of hello’s, good-morning's, how are you’s for the staff whose workspace is on the first level. A peep into the kitchen to see if there's anyone making breakfast  to continue this exchange and if not, then I make my way to the second floor.  
           I usually get settled in, make a ‘to-do list’—because my brain would be too scattered without it, and select some music that will be my soundtrack at least for a few hours.  I’m still trying to remember names, but already, the sincere kindness of the staff towards me has made me feel right at home here and they have been patient with me re-asking names and pronunciations. Lunch is usually a time for socializing, as some of us usually go to a nearby restaurant to get our meals to take away. Back at the office, A crowd forms around the lone table in the kitchen to get in on the topic of conversation for the day. Also, several of the staff cook lunch right there in the kitchen, and I am always curious to learn what's the food of choice for the day. Also, I love the communal spirit of sharing fruit or sweet treats, and its not uncommon to receive an e-mail or a visit declaring the presence of these in the kitchen below. 

            Currently, I am both learning many new things and putting previous skills acquired into use, thanks to the variation of tasks that I’ve been given so far.  I’ve helped with data entry, analyzing logic frameworks for grant proposals and logistics for the Women’s Build Research Project. My favourite so far has been contributing to a section on climate change and gender for an up-coming grant proposal. I was thrilled at the opportunity of working on the ‘gender-component’ of the grant application but then realized I had no clue as to the connection between gender and climate change. For the next few days, I spent my time delving into ‘climate change and gender’ and soon become so engrossed in the topic. Several of my family members have had to listen to me give several synopses on my learning process and latest discoveries on this topic. 
            In brief, although everyone in a community is adversely impacted by climate change, as many women are responsible for the upkeep of the home and the provision of food, drastic climate changes limit their ability to do so. When extreme flooding or drought causes a scarce food supply, women have to walk further and work harder to provide for the family, which is often a safety risk. There’s also the conflict caused between what men still expect women to do, and what they can do given the circumstances, and this often leads to increased instances of gender-based violence. These examples are just a few of the ways that gender intersects with climate change. The more information I read, and the more I began to understand the different debates surrounding this topic, it was evident that there is a strong relation between climate change and gender dynamics. In countries such as Vietnam which rely on agriculture as a major livelihood source, this is even more pronounced.

            The main project I am working on will begin to pick up once February begins, and once the researcher contracted to the project arrives from overseas, I will be providing support locally and visiting the communities with her. They are all several hours away, and it will be my first direct contact  and I am excited to see the communities and meet the people I have been learning so much about. As the days turn into weeks, I find myself learning about things such as biosand filters, climate adaptation and mitigation, disaster relief and micro-finance. Many of these things are areas or things that I am not familiar with. Sometimes I feel swamped with the technical aspects to ensure project success and the magnitude of acronyms found in reports and documents that I have never encountered.

             The best way I am able to conquer—our at least suppress my nerves, is to remind myself that I am here to learn.  My knowledge will only increase if I am willing to ask questions when I need to and be willing to admit when I don’t know something. I take confidence in the words of classmates who reiterate the importance of ‘Being gentle with myself’—Thanks Krista :)! and to ‘Do not shy away from letting your voice be heard—in a respectful way of course’—Thank you Aaka :)!. Some days are better than others in my attempt to not be overly self-critical and to be ‘gentle’ and to be ‘outspoken’ and push through my introverted tendencies. With time and some help along the way, I truly believe that my confidence in my ability to fulfill my role at Habitat will increase. At the end of each day- whether filled with highs or lows, I try to remind myself to be grateful for the hope that comes with the process of growth.


For more information of climate change and gender:


BRIDGE: Gender & Climate Change

Start Somewhere

            

            Its been four days since I’ve arrived, my senses still on edge from the unfamiliarity of it all.  The size and pace of this city feels intimidating and a self-induced pep talk is needed to get myself out of the hotel room and take in my first weekend. I begin my day of exploring with lunch at Au Parc, a quaint café that my supervisor introduced me to. I decided this time to sit outside to take in the view of the park and other activities happening across the street. I somewhat regret this choice of seating, thanks to one too many smokers sitting near-by. I struggle to convert the cost of what I want to order, calculating prices from Vietnamese Dong (VND) to US.

            After lunch, I try to decide which way to go and I walk around in circles for a few minutes before choosing to keep straight towards the Notre Dame Cathedral. I soon find that the area seems familiar, as I have driven pass it a few times while apartment hunting. I stop to take it in and observe the clash of old and new as the old post office stand near-by and skyscrapers and malls surround it. “Hello!! You want ride moto?!” Xe ôm drivers yell from a multitude of directions, asking if I want to pay to take a motorcycle taxi ride- a common form of transportation here. I do my best to maintain a firm "No thank you!" but it doesn’t let up. Soon enough I learn it’s easier to just smile and wave as you walk by, or to reply ‘I like to walk’ which is met with a round of laughter.

            I come across a street laced with art galleries and I am instantly grateful for this. I love exploring the art scene in new places, and on my first stop, both of the artists were at work painting. The wall, no less than 10 feet tall was strewn with vibrant paintings. One of the artists began to talk with me and soon after asks to take a photo of me with his art. He heads to a nearby cabinet and retrieves his own camera. I oblige on the condition that I too can take a photo of him with his work. After our exchange of words and photographs, I continue my walk, only to be stopped several times by curious persons on the street, asking where I was from and what I was doing in Saigon. The longest of these series of questions came from a wife and husband, not knowing where Barbados is, guessing maybe its in Africa. I tell them its in the Caribbean, and I soon find myself attempting to draw a map-in the air. Using America as the reference point, I try  to depict where exactly Barbados and the Caribbean is located in relation to here. Our conversation lasts a lot longer than I thought and I decide it’s a real good time to leave when I’m asked if I have ATM’s and ATM cards in my country, and if they could see mine. I make a quick exit by giving them Barbadian coins as a souvenir, saying thanks for the chat and I quicken my pace and walk away.

            For the rest of the afternoon, I browse the art galleries and shops that line the street and take in the decorations being hung in anticipation of Tet- the Vietnamese New Year. At night, above the street lights and the glow from the cars and motorcycles that zoom by, intricate light displays hang. Some are detailed with stars, and others with yellow blossoms to represent the North and pink blossoms to represent the South. Still unaccustomed to the thickness of the air caused by the heat, humidity and exhaust, I resolve that I’ve had enough for one day. For the second time, I try to follow the safety-guidelines I’ve been given to check for a reputable taxi. I check my notes; identify the taxi company, look for the driver’s registration card and check the logo and its colour. After a few tries, I find what seems to be an accurate match and it turns out  to be an uneventful, stress-free ride back to the hotel.

A Place to Call Home

             For the majority of us in the program, we arrived to our  global placements in our respective host countries with no real sense of where we would live for the next 6 months. The challenge with this is a part of you knows you will have a roof over your head, and find a place to call home. Another part is preoccupied with the anxiety that comes without having instant gratification, not knowing when and how things will fall into place. I arrived to Ho Chi Minh city with a hotel booked for a week and a mind full of hopes that I’d get something more long-term figured out preferably before Tet, the Vietnamese New Year. Recognizing that I could go either way—whether I truly wanted to remind myself of this, my backup plan was to book a hotel or guesthouse until something else came up. My search for housing began the morning after I arrived, with the help of my supervisor, and lasted about a week.

             The nature of the housing/ rental formality here is a cross-cultural experience within itself. I soon learnt that apartments for one individual immediately identifies you as a foreigner—especially over the phone, and almost always causes the cost of rent to rise significantly. Vietnamese families and households are structured around the extended family, and it is common for many generations to subsist under one roof. While the typical ‘apartment’ building does exist, many of the housing options offered are rooms within a home, and the family who owns the home often lives within the household as well. After two days of searching with my supervisor, we decided that I should go with one of the local staff for purposes of language translation and potential bargaining power.
           The outlook of the local staff on sourcing housing was  in no way negative, but a lot different. An example of this is I wanted to live in an area that was centrally located so I could walk to most things, versus closer to the office which is further away from the center and more crowded. In contrast, the local staff member was curious as to why I would want a slightly longer commute to work and why I would want to have to walk so much. From this particular housing adventure, I also learnt that I should not ‘give away’ my true feelings about a given apartment, especially if I liked it. If my interest was overt, this almost immediately means I have less of a chance to bargain, and suddenly, only the more expensive room will be the ‘only one available’.

            By the end of my first few days of being here, I felt as though I  had nothing  constant to hold on to. I had no personal connections with the place, I cannot speak a significant amount of the language. If I didn’t find housing prior to Tet, my time would be spent extending my stay in a hotel, and living out of my suitcases until I returned from Cambodia. During Tet- the Vietnamese celebration for the Lunar New Year, everything closes- including the office, so I needed to travel. Eventually it came to this, as all the potential housing options fell through. Mirroring something worthy of being in a novel, I booked a hotel for another week, went with my supervisor the following day to try to continue to search, and found an apartment! I waited most of the night to hear if the English and Vietnamese versions of the contract stated the same things, and by 9:30am the following morning, I had cancelled my hotel booking and moved into an apartment. Just like that! Now, I am mostly settled in, with one bowl, a travel mug, some plastic cups and a lone plastic spoon to my repertoire of utensils. Still, it’s cheaper to buy most of my meals than to buy food that needs to be cooked, so its not terribly inconvenient!

     Barely  two weeks constitute my time here! Even so, with that comes the longing for things familiar, and sometimes I can become preoccupied with my 'need' for things comfortable. I try my best to remind myself that being out of my comfort-zone is when I'm challenged the most, especially with the things you can't readily change. At the points in my life when I am in transit, select words from a song entitled ‘Wheel’ by John Mayer serve as a gentle yet compelling reminder. Counteracting my impatience with the current lack of predictability, these words function as a prompt to know that this moment is not permanent, but just a part of it all:

‘And you can't build a house of leaves

And live like it's an evergreen

It's just a season thing

It's just this thing that seasons do

…

And that's the way this wheel keeps working now

That's the way this wheel keeps working now

You can't love too much, one part of it’- J.M

-Joy

First Impressions

           I arrived to the airport after 24 hours of travelling, exhausted but ready to finally meet Vietnam, the country that has preoccupied my thoughts since October. I always store in my memory the first moment I encounter a new country. The moment of walking out of arrivals, the rush of heat, the clash of smells; the blur of unfamiliar faces. The explosion of chatter which forms into a single hum of people excitedly anticipating friends and love ones. In that instant, I am simultaneously overwhelmed and excited—a bit too much of both, as I try to scan the crowd for what I remember my supervisor looks like. Not long after, I hear my supervisor’s voice above the crowd shouting ‘Joy!’, waving a sign with my name on it to greet me.

            The drive from the airport to the hotel took about 20 minutes with traffic, and in between chatting with Elizabeth, I steal glimpse of what will become ‘home’ for the next few months—a city full of contradictions; as old meets new.  Remnants of French colonial influence grace old buildings. Motorcyclists outnumber cars—which I learn that when the rush hour begins, the sidewalks become another traffic lane. Street vendors sell their trades on every corner and meters away, top to bottom glass sky-rise business complexes and malls with stores like Gucci, sparkle in the sun.

             6 months from now, this place—its sounds, its people, the rhythm of the tonal language, the heat, will not seem so foreign. I will settle into a routine, I will begin my time working with Habitat, and I’ll find people who I connect with. At the end, I will feel as though I am being torn away from life as I know it. For now, I exist as a stranger to this captivating city of 10 million, trying to take every moment, sight and sound that swamps me.

The Starting Point

Barbados and Boston--both worlds and cultures apart from Vietnam. I find myself here after months of ambiguity to which country I would be placed in, excitement when notified of my placement in Vietnam, logistics, immunizations, but above all, anticipation. Thanks to the Masters of Social Work Global Practice/International Social Work Concentration at Boston College, my time in Vietnam- roughly 6 months, serves as my internship for my final semester of the graduate program. I did not have a choice per-say of which region or country I would be going to. We submit statement of interests, which include details on our past experiences, skills we possess and those we want to develop. 


Having an 'open-mind' has taken on a new level of understanding from this experience. Patience and trust that everything will fall in to place has been a reoccurring lesson. Somehow, I keep being directed in my travels for academic/career purposes to the region of South-East Asia. I was driving on the I-89 on my way to Vermont to Saint Michael's College (Saint Mikes!), which ironically provided the start to my previous South-East Asia adventures.  I was surprised when I received an e-mail from my program director Eileen, asking me to stop by her office. I called her and the reason: she had found a ‘potential  placement in Vietnam with Habitat for Humanity International’.

Four months and close to 24 hours of traveling later, I am back in South-East Asia--a region this Bajan girl has come to love, and in Vietnam for the very first time!!! I will be interning with Habitat for Humanity International Vietnam in their Ho Chi Minh City (Saigon) Office, as a Project Officer for their Women’s Build Research Project. Currently, the Women’s Build Research Project is an effort on Habitat’s part to evaluate the impact of their housing and adjoining programs on women and children. The research is being conducted in four different countries, with Vietnam chosen as the country of focus in Asia. Habitat for Humanity’s work with women is well lauded, as they have been able to open doors of opportunities to women that were once closed, including land ownership and property rights. I’m so honoured to play a role in helping to conduct this new gender-focused research. After hearing the description of the project, both Eileen and I agreed it was a ‘perfect fit’ considering my interest in gender-dynamics. I think that I’ll stop myself here on the topic of ‘gender' and 'gender in Vietnam' and save that for another post - well most likely several! :)

My reaction towards this opportunity is interwoven with emotions ranging from excitement to feeling a strong sense of responsibility to give of my best in this role. At moments—especially the days leading up to my arrival, I am overwhelmed with worries; insecurities, knowing that I will be thrust into an alien experience from my norm. Still, I am grateful, so grateful, to be here, to learn, to grow, to be challenged, to explore. I know full well that I am supported by an infinite source of grace, family and friends who will me on to pursue my purpose whole-heartedly. I am thankful that with this opportunity I will better learn how to give and both receive. With this comes the recognition that I do not arrive here fully informed, and there is much I will learn—If I am willing to do so, from those I around me.

In brief, Habitat for Humanity International is guided by the vision of ‘A world where everyone has a decent place to live’.

For more information on Habitat for Humanity International Vietnam (HFHIV) and the project I am focusing on, see the following links:

HFHIV:

http://www.habitatvietnam.org/

Why does HFHIV focus on women? :

Habitat for Humanity International: Women Key to Success in Vietnam

I'll try my best to  capture my thoughts and update this often enough. 

Until next time!

-Joy